I hear you Mike, and with Profoto, I'll probably have many sets of grids, but what about snoots??
Don't they make that super crisp nose and neck shadow you cannot achieve with grids? That what I remember about using snoots years ago.
I left snoot for awhile as Lumedyne' snoot contraption was so clumsy.
Grids work and I use them, though they have a lot of bite, depending on the fixture they mount on. One way to smooth them out is to put 1/2 stop spun (under) the grid, though be careful about heat, with flash, be very careful with hot lights.
For the directional look your probably describing, nothing works as well as a fresnel. Profoto made a great one, now I think they kind of make a generic one, Bron has thier flooter which is good, though if you are in a studio you can black out, the cheapest is a 1 or 2k arri tungesten. You'll need power and the ability to work with the heat, but tungsten is beautiful with most digital, regardless of how it screws up the blue channel.